blargblog

And already the Humbert Humbert comparisons fly. (Though inappropriate: la Britta's no longer a teen star.) --So did the blow-tied one dwell at great length on Madonna's osculatory abilities?

Turns out the President was the one who told Britney she had to kiss Madonna on MTV.

[Amy raises a bottle of bourbon in honor of Kevin and his nerves of steel... then hits herself in the head with said bottle until she passes out so as to never have to look... into... THOSE EYES !!! THOSE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE EMPTY EYES... EVER AGAIIIN !!!!]

What are you talking about? Those eyes are pools of wisdom. It's easy to see what she and Madonna have in common. How could Madonna resist sharing her seasoned lips with this world-wise soulmate and boon companion? Imagine the conversations about art and life they must have over glasses of wine in Madonna's penthouse apartment as Lourdes frolicks around their feet. The Gertrude Stein of Pop has met her Alice B. Toklas at last.

Pinkham, I've known there was something deeply wrong with you for a long time. I mean, ever since that long-ago Boo Ball... Y'know, the one where you insisted on dressing up like Her Unholiness in the "Like A Prayer" video, helped yourself to all the hash in Curtis Salgado's pipe, groped the deputy Fire Commissioner, and passed out into the punch bowl after begging Vera to "dirty dance" with you. Until tonight, however, I never realized the depths of your disturbance. Tsk.

Kevin, I really think that you and Jen need to rethink letting Pinkham be the kid's godfather. Surely someone more wholesome, like a punk-rocker or a City Council member, could be tapped for the post, hmmm... ?

When some friends of mine were dabbling in Kareoke and I was practicing at home in order to work up the courage to join them, I actually did dabble with learning the lyrics to "Like a Prayer."

Scary but true.

I haven't been contacted yet about godfathering Owen (I think I heard Kip call shotgun on that one) but I am The Godfather of Souled Out.

I wish I were having as much fun as you claim. Perhaps I blacked it all out. Maybe that's the deal. My Dr. Jeckyll is out there having a fabulous time at the Boo Ball, while I stay home and Boo Hoo like a pimpled teenager.

Welcome to the club, Jeremy Baby. ;)

I can't believe I spent a minute of my life reading the deep thoughts of Br*tn*y Sp**rs......then again, I spent seven hours today at City Hall watching the facial expressions of a cop we were deposing...

And, commenting on the remarks....I'd trust him if he weren't such a short-bus riding inbred credulating nitwit with peat moss for a cortex!

All you fellow Californians out there: Britney for Governor!

Yikes:

CARLSON: Do you trust this president?

SPEARS: Yes, I do.

CARLSON: Excellent. Do you think he's going to win again?

Uh, excellent?

Tucker is a bow-tied conservative pundit, the right side of whatever "debate" they conduct on "Crossfire". I was pleased to see Janeane Garofalo has taken the left side of the table. Unlike Paul Begala and other asses who have sat on that side, Janeane's politics qualify as truly left. Not gee whiz moderate. But fuck you liberal. My kinda gal.

"Excellent. Do you think he's going to win again?"

Holy shit. Tucker Carlson is the bastard child of Mr. Burns and Waylon Smithers.

By the way, isn't Britney a little young to be indulging a fetish for wigs? Did Madonna seduce her only to cut off her hair, ala Delilah?

"...My kinda gal."

Plus, she'd never dance the hootchie-kootchie on TV for Bob Dole. Always a good thing. :D

She might dance the hootchie-kootchie for Noam Chomsky.

I wouldn't. Noam has seriously bad hair.

I can see it now: "Queer Eye for a Straight Guy" takes on Chomsky. "Class warfare is all well and good, honey but let's face it: that jacket is SO 1977. If you want anyone to take you seriously, you HAVE to do something about those old man glasses. UGH! Manufacturing consent? More like manufacturing bad taste!"

Chomsky? Why not send the Fab 5 to make over Ralph Nader? :)

He's got that nebbish Woody Allen sex appeal. Why mess with perfection?

'Cause Chomsky is stealing all the chicas, man. Me and the boys are sick of Noamy hogging all the campus action with that slide rule of his. We're going to call Domino's and have a hundred pizzas sent to East Timor.

"He's got that nebbish Woody Allen sex appeal. Why mess with perfection?"

Really. I decided a couple of weeks ago while a net pal and I were discussing Jung, that if my animus could take a physical form it'd be Ralph. Only younger and balder. ;)

I have to go hit Aaron in the face with a cat now. :p

Geez guys. Lay off Britney. It's not her job to be politically or otherwise astute. She's built a career out of singing passably enough to become a fuck fantasy. And, if income & public opinion have any relevance, she's been pretty good at it.

Shouldn't you aim your venom at, oh, maybe CNN for actually airing that crap? Hell, if Carlson wanted to interview me that way I'd be there in a second. But why would CNN want to air my opinions? I know why they want to show ol' BS. The implied nudity & sexuality is great for ratings. If only my implied nudity & sexuality were that good for ratings I'd be rich now & sneering at you low-rent lefties.

"She's built a career out of singing passably enough to become a fuck fantasy."

But not well enough to surpass the vocal charms of my favorite fuck fantasy, John Ashcroft.

It's everybody's job in a democracy to be politically astute! And this jumped-up mallrat dumbass has chosen to use her public prominence to endorse George Bush. I say, aim thy satirical and critical cannons and fire away.